Published: November 03, 2009 06:43 am      

GUEST COLUMN: Lynda's new hobby

By Jim Holmes

So my wife walks in the house a couple of months ago and says, "Jim, I'm taking up a new hobby. I am going to start making greeting cards!"

I respond, "Hey that sounds great, Honey. Have a ball!"

I'm thinking, "Hey that sounds cheap, Honey. Have a ball!"

I mean, how much could it cost to make a greeting card? I can walk into any drug store or supermarket in the Suwannee Valley and I suspect I would be hard pressed to spend much more than five bucks on the most elaborate card in stock.

So my wife now has a hobby in which she picks up a piece of paper, cuts it in half (that's a savings in itself), folds it in center, puts a design on the front and adds a thoughtful greeting inside.

I am tickled pink! This is not knitting. This is not home redecorating ... nor quilting. It's not even a daylong shopping trip at the mall. This new hobby has to be a husband's dream come true.

And so, being a man -- who shall we say respects a buck -- I encourage my wife to pursue this new endeavor earnestly. I go so far as to tell her, "Honey, go to the store and buy everything you need." I'm thinking a little construction paper, colored pens and heck, let's splurge and buy a new pair of scissors.

It's when she brings me back the bills that I discover her idea of card making and mine are much different. Who knew so much gear was needed to make a greeting card?

Not only that, but I learn she and her buds can't make their cards in Live Oak (maybe there is a shortage of scissors here), but need to drive 70 miles round trip to Lake City each week in order to do the work. And heck, don't forget the nice luncheon that must follow a morning filled with the always labor intensive job of snipping and folding paper.

Little did I know, but my wife's homemade greeting cards and Michelangelo's Sistine Chapel frescoes just might end up having more in common than I thought possible.

You know, American business people are brilliant. First off, they come up with a method of mass-producing products -- like greeting cards -- for just pennies per item. Then they turn around and somehow convince us that we should spend a lot more money to make the same item on our own

That's genius!

Mind you, the cards that Lynda and her buds are making are both beautiful and unique. I'm delighted she is having so much fun doing it. She calls it "good therapy." And I must admit, if she needs any therapy it's because she has had to put up with me for nearly 40 years.

At any rate, this holiday season look for a special card from us. It will be easy to spot. Not necessarily because of the card itself, but due to the fact Lynda and I will hand deliver it on our bikes - as we will no longer be able to afford gasoline or postage.

Jim Holmes lives in Live Oak.